Wrecking Ralph and the Bully

Last night my best friend, Bree, had to take her son Ralph to the ER. I call him Ralph because it’s short for Wrecking Ralph and if you knew this kid you would understand! He’s a mix between a dare devil, chaotic, accident prone, and wild. He is a sweet child don’t get me wrong, and he’s very smart but he throws caution to the wolves. He’s not even 3 and has been to the ER three times. Not because mom and dad’s neglect but because this boy is all of the above. You can’t hold this kid down. It’s like trying to leash a grizzly bear…aint happening! He wasn’t a year old yet and decided to base jump off the bed. That ended in a broken collar bone. Then a little after a year, he did a forward facing ½ summersault pike dive off the couch and landed himself stitches in the lip. And last night the entertainment center jumped him and that landed staples in his head. Poor kid!! I guess he had to try to be like Trooper. Only positive is it’s right here at Halloween and it goes good with costumes.

But thinking about Ralph and Trooper it dawned on me…we have bullies as entertainment centers. Both entertainment centers jumped our kids. They’re too chicken to jump someone their own size, they can only pick on the little ones. I’m boycotting the bullies. I’m gonna leave dust in their eyes. How dare them hurt our children. Right now mine knows I’m packing heat. I’ve got my eyes on it and one wrong move and BAM!!! Pledge time! Mess with my kid and see what happens.

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